Leavin' with a Fat Lip

'David! Over here! I'd like you to meet the Dregs of Society. Dregs... David.' *David extends his hand in greeting and gets punched in the face for his trouble, falling to the floor as the altercation passes over the top of him*

True story. What a way to end a night out. Laughing, apparently, too loudly as some guys had to stop their car and get out to remove some traffic cones placed in the road earlier. Perhaps placed there by my friends. 'You think that's funny do you?' Comes the thickly accented shout from the car. 'Yes' goes our innocent reply. And the rest passes in a blur, shouts from one side, laughter from ours, culminating in a windmill of a punch that blindsides me. In the movie version of my life, I'd catch his fist in mid-air and flip him over my shoulder. In the factual account, I was looking away, thinking the whole situation was stupid, and got clocked. I think, and I'm still trying to figure how this justifies the result, my crime was saying, 'So you had to get out of your car... life's pretty tough isn't it?' And please feel free to read as much sarcasm as you like into that statement.

I was trowelling it on.